Thursday, 21 July 2011


 I believe in the influence of lyrics and that they can inspire and move individuals. Music inspires me in everything I do. Music can comfort when I am feeling sad, lonely, happy, discouraged, unsure. Lately, I have been on a path that is a little left of the one I want to be on. Two nights ago I was driving, the sunset was enchanting, the breeze was perfect and it felt like a suitable time to reflect on these past few months and the decisions I have made. The perfect song came on. It's incredible how whenever I am doubting myself or something else, the Lord always provides answers in uncommon and most unexpected of ways. The lyrics spoke entirely to me. I couldn't help but cry tears of glee and gratitude for these words were precisely what I have been needing to hear for a long time.

So you made a lot of mistakes, walked down the road a little sideways 

Cracked a brick when you hit the wall. Yeah, you've had a pocket full of regrets pull you down faster than a sunset.
It happens to us all 
When the cold hard rain just won't quit and you can't see your way out of it 
You find your faith has been lost and shaken, you take back what's been taken 
get on your knees and dig down deep, you can do what you think is impossible 
Keep on believing, don't give in, it'll come and make you whole again 
It always will, it always does 
Love is unstoppable 
It can weather any storm, bring you back to being born again 
it's a helping hand when you need it most, a lighthouse shinning on the coast that never goes dim. 
When your heart is full of doubt, and you think that there's no way out 
Keep on believing, don't give in, it'll come and make you whole again.

It always will, it always does.
Love is unstoppable.

I have learned that you can never be too far gone to come back, too deep to pull out or too far off the road to turn around. You can never be too broken to be pieced back together. When you feel broken and feel that have nothing left to give, get on your knees. When you have no faith left in yourself, the Lord does. It is never too late to ask for help. The Lord always has the right answers and he will always provide them. Perhaps not in the way you want, or at the time you want, but he will. Sometimes I forget this and lose sight of the fact that his plan for me is bigger than my plan for myself. Things won't always go my way, or how I planned, but I know that if something doesn't happen, it is for a reason. I may not always know those reasons, and I may never know, but I have faith that the Lord knows what is best for me and if I put my full faith in him and live a life pleasing to him, than I will be blessed and my burden will be lightened. 

Friday, 15 July 2011

Nice to meet you Insomnia.

Last night, while insomnia and I were best friends (not by choice) I decided to wander over to Adam Young’s blog for some creative inspiration, as I usually do when my best friend comes for late night visits. I feel him and I are terribly alike, although his mind is far more innovative and subjective than my own, I like to think we would make an impeccable team. As I read I became more and more infatuated with this uncanny man that I will never have the pleasure of having a rendezvous with. Just when I thought couldn’t fall more in love with this unattainable human being, I came across THE blog entry. The one that conclusively explains his personality to a T, and coincidently, mine. See, I told you, we’re perfect for each other. He goes on to explain the 10 misconceptions about introverts. A category of people that makes up only 25% of our population. A category that Adam, and myself fall in. 
Myth #1 – Introverts don’t like to talk.
This is not true. Introverts just don’t talk unless they have something to say. They hate small talk. Get an introvert talking about something they are interested in, and they won’t shut up for days.
Myth #2 – Introverts are shy.
Shyness has nothing to do with being an Introvert. Introverts are not necessarily afraid of people. What they need is a reason to interact. They don’t interact for the sake of interacting. If you want to talk to an Introvert, just start talking. 
Myth #3 – Introverts are rude.
Introverts often don’t see a reason for beating around the bush with social pleasantries. They want everyone to just be real and honest.
Myth #4 – Introverts don’t like people.
On the contrary, Introverts intensely value the few friends they have. They can count their close friends on one hand. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. Once you have earned their respect as being a person of substance, you’re in.
Myth #5 – Introverts don’t like to go out in public.
Nonsense. Introverts just don’t like to go out in public FOR AS LONG. They also like to avoid the complications that are involved in public activities. They take in data and experiences very quickly, and as a result, don’t need to be there for long to “get it.” They’re ready to go home, recharge, and process it all. In fact, recharging is absolutely crucial for Introverts.
Myth #6 – Introverts always want to be alone.
Introverts are perfectly comfortable with their own thoughts. They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time.
Myth #7 – Introverts are weird.
Introverts are often individualists. They don’t follow the crowd. They’d prefer to be valued for their novel ways of living. They think for themselves and because of that, they often challenge the norm. They don’t make most decisions based on what is popular or trendy.
Myth #8 – Introverts are aloof nerds.
Introverts are people who primarily look inward, paying close attention to their thoughts and emotions. It’s not that they are incapable of paying attention to what is going on around them, it’s just that their inner world is much more stimulating and rewarding to them.
Myth #9 – Introverts don’t know how to relax and have fun.
Introverts typically relax at home or in nature, not in busy public places. Introverts are not thrill seekers and adrenaline junkies. If there is too much talking and noise going on, they shut down. Their brains are too sensitive to the neurotransmitter called Dopamine. Introverts and Extroverts have different dominant neuro-pathways. Just look it up.
Myth #10 – Introverts can fix themselves and become Extroverts.
A world without Introverts would be a world with few scientists, musicians, artists, poets, filmmakers, doctors, mathematicians, writers, and philosophers. That being said, there are still plenty of techniques an Extrovert can learn in order to interact with Introverts. 

Wednesday, 6 July 2011

Patiently waiting...

I thought I had lost all hope in the male species. Maybe they weren’t all entirely helpless and incompetent, maybe it was just me getting involved with all the wrong ones, or me having my head up in the clouds. What ever happened to dating? Was I totally insane to think that a boy should call you, ask you out on date, pick you up, come up to the door, open your car door, have something fun and creative planned and not want to get something from you on the first date? Forgive me for not being too thrilled about getting asked out over text message and having to drive myself to your house and arrive to find you playing Halo with all your room-mates. Maybe I am just a hopeless romantic and have unrealistic expectations of a romance like Tristan and Isolde’s. I want butterflies fluttering anxiously in my stomach. Is that so hard to come by? do they even exist? I want to be told I am the most beautiful girl in the world, be kissed on the forehead, have flowers brought to me for no reason, texted just to make sure I got home safe, have notes left on my car, not be told that you are too busy to see me, believed in, trusted, hugged for no reason. Maybe this is why I don’t give anyone a fair chance, because I have un-realistic hopes for them. Maybe someone needs to bring me down off this cloud up here, but I feel like I should stay on it a little longer. 
Everyone always asks me, why aren’t you dating anyone? Why don’t you date him, he really likes you!? Why did you break things off with him? Why don’t you date a lot of people? The truth is, I don’t really know. I have had more flings in this past year than most people have in a lifetime...Ok, maybe not that many (I’m not a floosy), but you get the idea. I gain interest in someone, go out with them a few times, and quickly lose interest. I could never get really excited about anyone. I’m not a believer in forcing things, and if it’s not there, it’s not there. I am trying to hold out for someone great. Someone who thinks the world of me, someone that would sit and wait for hours, just to see me for a few minutes, someone that calls me back when I hang up on him, someone that wants to show me off to his friends, someone that constantly reminds me how much he cares and how he would do anything for me. I am still waiting for him. Maybe I will be waiting for a long time, but I am willing to wait. The wait will be worth it.